


Of Best Friends and Boobs

by Januarium



Category: Glee
Genre: Episode Related, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Phone Calls & Telephones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-06
Updated: 2014-03-06
Packaged: 2018-01-14 19:08:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1277596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Januarium/pseuds/Januarium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt’s just coming home from the diner, when he gets an unexpected call from Blaine, who is home after the lock-in went wrong. 5x10 reaction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Best Friends and Boobs

Kurt’s just finishing getting home from his late shift at the diner when his phone starts buzzing. He’s surprised to see Blaine’s face beaming up at him, but after the night he’s had it’s certainly welcome. “Hey sweetie, I thought I wasn’t hearing from you tonight, did Sue catch you again?”

He’s surprised to hear a deep sigh from the other end of the line. “No, though Becky did, but she just wanted to makes us play Twister and drink 11-hour energy drinks.”

“Oh god, you didn’t did you? You know those make you loopy.”

“I didn’t, but it doesn’t matter anyway, Sam and Tina  _ruined_  it.”

“Oh no, what did they do?” Kurt had been receiving excited texts all day about the plans, with strict instructions he was not to contact Blaine for anything after 9pm, unless it was an emergency.

“They made out.”

“Oh.” Kurt had to take a moment to consider that prospect. It was sort of weird it had never happened before. “In front of you?”

“No,” Blaine huffed, “Well, sort of, I walked in and caught them and they stopped, and we talked about it and Sam keeps talking about Tina’s boobs. Her  _boobs_ , Kurt!”

“Well, at least they stopped.” He thought for a moment. “Does Sam not normally talk about boobs?”

“Why would he talk about boobs?”

“You have this whole, you know, ‘bro’ thing going on. And me and Finn had our share of late night lady chats where boobs came up.” The reminder makes Kurt nostalgic, so he gets a pan out to warm up some milk. It’s been a long night, and it’s nice to think of a memory of Finn and actually enjoy it, even if it is kind of a weird one.

“Wait, does that mean you talked about… guy parts? Would would the equivalent of boobs be? Butts?”

Kurt giggles a little, “Well, I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but girls have butts, too.”

Blaine makes an affected gasp, “Nooo, surely not!”

“They do, trust me, living with Santana involves seeing more girl-butt than I ever expected to.”

Blaine laughs, “Well you know what I meant.”

Kurt thinks about it. “Not really? I mean, now you mention it I may have mentioned your butt a couple of times, when Dad and Carole were in DC and we tried rum hot chocolate instead. Mostly though, it wasn’t a big deal. Was Sam like, going into loads of detail? Because that would be creepy on a different level.”

“Not really? He’ll just say they’re good, or whatever. I just,” Kurt waits while Blaine collects his thoughts. “I just think, yeah Sam likes boobs, that’s great, there’s nothing wrong with that, I just don’t get why he feels the need to talk about  _Tina’s_  boobs.”

Kurt can’t help but let out a snort before he replies, “So you wish he would just keep it behind closed doors and stop rubbing our faces in it?” 

“I didn’t - Kurt!” Blaine says, but they both start laughing and the tension is broken. The milk is heated and Kurt puts it into a mug and takes it to bed. “Okay, I’m being a bit ridiculous, but I’m still pissed at them. Plus he’s saying this stuff with Tina right there! It’s objectifying.”

“I can’t argue with that. How does Tina react?”

“Usually she stops crying.”

“Wait, why is she crying?” Kurt sits up so fast he nearly spills his milk.

“She’s just sad about leaving. She’s worried we won’t talk any more, once we’ve graduated.”

“Of course you’ll still talk!” It’s a gut reaction to say it, but then Kurt remembers how easy it’s been not to keep up with some people. But he manages it with Mercedes, and she’s a lot further away than Tina will be if she gets into Brown.

“I think so, but it’s hard. She said she hasn’t spoken to Rachel in months, you know?”

Kurt sighs, “Well I don’t think she’d want to talk to her right now. Or maybe she does, she can have her.”

“Oh honey, I’m sorry, I’ve just been complaining about my stuff. How’re things going there?”

Kurt sips his milk and snuggles his legs under the covers, sitting against his headboard, as he tries to figure how to begin to answer. “Elliott quit the band.”

“What? Oh my god, what happened?” Hearing Blaine’s genuine concern unwinds him a bit more.

“Well, Rachel’s staying with him, and I guess that made Santana decide they had to fight over him as well. They did this number in the diner, you know Gloria from Flashdance?”

“Oh yeah, the Laura Branigan song?”

Kurt can’t help but smile a bit at Blaine’s extensive musical knowledge, “That’s the one. But they brought Elliott in - he doesn’t even work there - and were just trying to outdo each other. It was so unprofessional.”

“Wait, Elliott joined in the number, but then he quit?”

“Well, afterwards there was this big stupid argument and then Elliott chewed everyone out and left. I need him! Dani’s not always around, and Santana and Rachel have so many Funny Girl rehearsals they miss most of ours.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, sweetie.” They sit for a bit, and Kurt allows himself to wallow. Just a little. “Okay, I’m going to say something, but tell me if it’s way off base.”

Kurt can’t help but be intrigued. “Go on.”

“Why not lose Rachel and Santana from the band? The other two are less drama, plus it might be a bit of a wake up call to them?”

Kurt mulls it over. “Maybe. But I’m not sure Dani will go for staying in a band her girlfriend’s been kicked out of.”

“True. You’ll never know unless you try, though. Wait, is Santana not home?”

“Nope, she’s on the overnight shift. It’s weird only having one roommate, I actually get to be alone occasionally.”

“Wait,” Blaine says, and Kurt knows that tone. “You’re actually alone?  _Alone_  alone?”

Kurt finishes his milk and wriggles down to lie in bed. “Didn’t I just say that? Why would you happen to be asking, Mr. Anderson?”

Blaine laughs lightly. “I can’t believe you’ve been alone this whole time.”

“Need I remind you we were both in truly terrible and unsexy moods when you called?”

“I don’t know, knowing you’re alone tends to pick up my mood pretty quickly,” Blaine says and Kurt can practically see the cheesey suggestive grin on his face.

Kurt help but tease, “You sure you aren’t too traumatised by boobs?”

“It’s not boobs I’m traumatised by, it’s just… Sam and Tina, okay?” Kurt can hear Blaine is just playing at being annoyed.

“Okay, sorry for bringing it up.” Kurt couldn’t help but notice the bust on his table. “You know, I think they’re pretty cool.”

“What?”

“Boobs.”

“Wait, how did this get back to boobs, this is so not the direction I was going for.”

“Sorry, I just got distracted. They’re just so… bouncy, and they provide so many design opportunities, you know? There’s a lot less you can do with a flat chest.”

Blaine laughs, and Kurt can’t even be offended at being laughed at, because it’s such a wonderful sound. “I guess you make a good point.”

“Of course I do.” Kurt’s cosy in bed, and with some of the stress melted away, he’s suddenly exhausted. “So what was the direction you were going for?” He says, but it’s followed up by an enormous yawn.

“We’re both tired, why don’t we leave it for tonight?”

“Noo,” Kurt says, but he’s already drifting off. “You could just jerk off while I fall asleep.”

“That’s… really creepy, Kurt,” Blaine says in that fond tone that makes Kurt’s chest ache with missing him.

“Okay, maybe a little creepy. I’ll tell you right away next time I’m alone, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I love you,” Kurt says, badly holding himself awake.

“I love you, too,” He hears, before the phone cuts out and he drifts away.


End file.
